Friday Funny is on You!


Ronnie and the boys laughin’ it up

Oh, sure, I could share the overly-long but nevertheless hysterical Hot Wheels video (complete with Fast ‘n Furious Slo Mo Action Shots) or the other overly-long but hysterical video of the three year-old girl in a pink tutu and black riding helmet making multiple efforts to mount a Shetland pony (that is exactly the same size as she and blessed with the patience of Job) But, what I really want to know is what made you laugh this past week?

Monday Moment

From the “Awwww….!” Files:

mama and babes in hsOn Thursday morning staff and students arrived to the high school to find a mother duck and her newly hatched ducklings at the main entrance.

A call was made to the non-emergency line at Fire and Rescue. An engine arrived with some very capable “duck catchers”. The firefighters gently scooped up the babies in a box. Mama got nervous and flew off, but then came back and followed the fire fighters as they slowly carried the box with the ducklings to a nearby retention pond behind the main parking lot. Everyone was cheering.

Mama duck had other ideas. Within an hour the family made their way through the parking lot and back to the main entrance. This time, a quick call was made to the PAWS Wildlife Center. Their expert opinion was that mother duck knew that there was water on the back side of the school campus and that is where she wanted to take her family. To oblige mama duck, a new plan was hatched.

A creative writing class and some staff members were recruited to create a silent “human wall”. The front and back door were opened and mama escorted her brood through the main entrance and out the other side to the back of the school. Mama and her babies waddled their way to a safe location and everyone at the school is very happy.

Friday Funny

i have questionsI was out to lunch the other day (literally, not figuratively) with co-workers at a nearby breakfast/lunch place.

“I’ve always wondered,” one co-worker said as we slid into our booth, “why a breakfast and lunch place has votive candles on the tables.”

We look at the candle holder she’s holding up.

“Is there a candle in there?”

“Yep. Burned wick, and covered in dust.”

That got me thinking about other things that don’t make much sense:

  • It’s a thing. We all talk about it. So, why, in an otherwise totally empty theater, bus, or open grassy field in a park, do people choose to pull up a seat right by where you are seated or situated?
  • If love is blind, why does lingerie sell so well?
  • Why are there Interstate Highways in Hawaii? (Actually, I know the answer to that, because the WA State Ferry system in the Puget Sound is considered part of the State Highway system. Who says highways are only made of asphalt? Why not water or air?)
  • Why is a team sport, in which only one player’s foot ever touches the ball, called Football? I mean, Baseball and Basketball and Handball make sense. What is the root, or genesis of the words Rugby, Soccer, or Cricket for that matter? Badminton? Hockey? Tennis? Luge? Ping Pong?
  • “Can I ask you a question?”
    “You just did, so why ask?”
  • Why is it called a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free of charge?
  • Why do people long for immortality when they can’t figure out what to do on a rainy Saturday afternoon?
  • Can you imagine a world without hypothetical situations?
  • If a train station is where a train stops, what is a work station? Exactly.
  • If the pen is mightier than a sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is Twitter? Wait. Don’t answer that.
  • Why are there Braille signs on the drive-through ATMs?
  • Ironic, but I’m pretty sure “Do Not Walk on Grass” signs did not just sprout up in the middle of a lawn.
  • Why didn’t Noah just swat those two mosquitoes when he had the chance?!

Why, Words…Why?

  • Why isn’t phonetic spelled like it sounds? For that matter, why is monosyllabic a polysyllabic word?
  • If “21” is pronounced twenty-one, why isn’t “11” pronounced tenty-one?
  • If a lawyer can be disbarred, and clergy defrocked, then electricians should be delighted, musicians denoted, and cowboys deranged. Right?
  • Ever know someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly, peccable or whelmed? Yeah, me neither.
  • If “con” and “pro” are opposites, then it follows that Congress is the opposite of progress…right?